There were no pigeons in the trees on that day because it was only June and the acorns weren't ready yet. I was still discovering the Bible and was reading as systematically as possible. We had been told by our teachers and elders to read it every day and I liked the idea so much that now, forty-five years later, I still read the scriptures every day. I was reading the Gospel of St. Matthew and I think that was the first time I'd read about the miracle of the loaves and fishes: the way Jesus took a few loaves and fishes, blessed them, and divvied them up to the multitude of five thousand and all had enough to eat, because the food kept multiplying through the sharing. I should also add that there were likely way more than five thousand, perhaps ten thousand or more. It was only recorded that there were five thousand men, besides women and children and I would imagine that in those days only men were legally considered persons.
The concept of more with less was revived for me when I was twenty-three and I was made aware of the More With Less Cookbook, conforming to Mennonite ideals of simplicity and resourcefulness. I never obtained or read the cookbook, but I was sold on the concept and since I was already living in a creatively frugal fashion, it wasn't that difficult. It seemed that no matter how poor I was I could always afford to have people over for dinner. I was never able to do the math, but I think that God was multiplying his provision to me through these acts of generosity.
I continued to live this way, also gathering wild herbs and drying them at home to be used for tea and seasoning: rosehips, fennel, mint and chamomile. I continued having people over and my kitchen at times seemed to be always busy. I loved feeding people, something I've only stopped doing so much in recent years. My little apartment seems too small for this kind of hospitality, even though I was feeding people dinner in places even smaller than this one. I suppose it's become a matter of practicality. In my work as a caregiver I've found that I need time alone at home to rest if I am to do my job well the next day, as well as needing at least one day off every week away from people. It isn't tht I had more energy for people when I was younger, rather that by not knowing when to slow down I was burning myself out and making myself useless to everyone, bad enough in my social connections and even worse when my job performance was being impacted.
There is also an ongoing menace of bedbugs which I don't want anyone bringing into my apartment, any more than I want anyone to catch any that might still be lingering somewhere. A year ago, for a brief while, I did try again entertaining at home. Then came a bedbug infestation that took three months to get rid of.
I suppose I'm in a different stage of life. I need time to rest, to contemplate and enjoy being still. I enjoy still my time with people close to me but this generally happens outside or in the coffee shop, occasionally in their homes, never in mine. It is almost as though I have paid my dues in hospitality, many times over and now this field has been put out for fallow.
I still find that I am doing very well with very little, even though I live in Vancouver. There always seems to be money left over for what I am needing and for vacations. I have been told that I am very good at budgeting. Perhaps. My ongoing Christian faith has also kept me from becoming acquisitive or materialistic. I really only buy something if I really need it. Preparing good, wholesome nutritious meals on very little still never seems a problem.
I do miss sharing more with others at times. I also know that that period of life is something long past and now I am resting and perhaps preparing for a new phase of multiplying loaves and fishes. Even if I am a vegetarian.
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