My last year, 1985, in the basement apartment was my most intense and most difficult and most challenging. I started the year desperately poor. Then, as I was preparing to train for my new job at the Snooty Church Social Services Society the first of March I was hit by the most intense toothaches. I had to pay out of my own pocket for a series of extractions of wisdom teeth. I was kept awake the whole night before my first training day, resulting in less than two hours sleep. To my amazement I got through the training okay and for the first few months it was the honeymoon. They loved me. Following work I would often go straight downtown, though sometimes I went home instead. I simply integrated my work life into my ministry. I also landed into some rather intense friendships with needy and very attractive persons seeking in me spiritual mentorship.
I portioned myself off like thick slices of bread to everyone. I walked everywhere, attended daily mass and entered into an intense spiritual reality that brought together the visible and the invisible. I acquired an intense spirituality such as drew some and frightened others, often both. Then I met a rather charming fellow, chronic alcoholic and drug user with mental health issues, who became quite obsessed with me. He seemed to be following me, I challenged him about it and soon he was staying with me. I was woken one night by his weeping (he was sleeping in the living room). He was morning the loss of his lover who had the same name as me. He disappeared then returned four days later. I took him to detox where he stayed a week, then lived with me a few days longer till he seemed better. Then he returned to the part of Canada he came from.
In the meantime my neighbour upstairs acquired a lover, a man, who moved in with her along with his young daughter. The dynamic of the house changed noticeably. He acquired a fast and intense jealous hatred of me and life soon became intolerable. With some drama I gave my notice, found an apartment downtown and left forever.
No turning back.
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