Men Need To Be More Like Women 3

I still cant type a proper question mark nor in some cases an apostrophe.  The question marks still come out as É, though sometimes they don't.  Hello Windows 10.  RIP Windows 7.

Before I go on to explain just why and in what ways men need to be more like women just let me drop a little conversation bomb in your midst, Gentle Reader: 

Men are more like women.

That's right.  You heard me the first time.

We are not really that different, and most men, when it feels safe, will let down their guard and show to others their better side.  We are after all human, all of us, and humanity always trumps gender and if it doesn't then there is something dreadfully wrong with this picture.  I am not going to go into any of this nurture versus nature nonsense nor make any effort to support or discredit the alleged differences between the male and female brains.  As far as I'm concerned the research is still largely inconclusive and anecdotal and we are therefore left in the realm of personal opinion, and I believe that we already know what I think of opinions.  And as for that dreadful John Gray and his absolutely stupid book about Women being from Venus and men are from Uranus, don't even get me started.  I have heard already about his specious nonsense and all his findings are purely anecdotal based on a very narrow cultural sampling.

That said, whether through nurturing or from the way we are biologically wired, there are some important binary distinctions that mark male and female identity for many, perhaps for the majority, but not for everyone.  Its this one size fits all mentality that I really tend to lose patience with.  So what if the majority of little boys choose toy guns and trucks and little girls usually go for dolls.  There will still be exceptions.  Whether or not this is from cultural conditioning or not, who cares  We still have to, and ought to, celebrate the huge diversity we have in gender: besides cis men and cis women we have transwomen, transmen, asexuals, androgynous, intersex, as well as the full range of sexual orientation.  (I believe that I have already informed some of you nosy parkers out there that I am asexual and androgynous).  Underscoring all of this is the incredible competiveness that gets bred into us, and this dynamic knows no gender.  It is often differently manifested by different genders because of conditioning (likely) even though competiveness is generally thought of as a male trait.

So, in what ways, specifically should men be more like women  I am not about to suggest that men wear makeup or cosmetics though some already do.  I would love it if more women would identify and challenge the collective self-hatred with which the advertising has brainwashed them into hating their bodies and their looks making it necessary for them to buy their products.  Nor am I suggesting that men cry and squeal and jump up and down and hug each other and talk about everything, especially their girlfriends or boyfriends all through the night with their buddies.  Nor do I think that men need to cultivate a craving for quiche and white wine (boy, does this reference ever date me!)

The traditional female traits, nurturing, gentleness, empathy, communication, sensitivity and aesthetic appreciation, are not specifically nor exclusively female characteristics.  They are human characteristics.  They are among the finest and highest human characteristics which many women, as part of having to cope with the assholes that men often are, have had to develop by default of having to kill their male partners.  What has made men into assholes (though I would say that some of us are also rather decent)  Power.  Far too much disproportionate power.  For men to become more human they need to become more like women, which is to say they have to give up some of their power.

It is alarming to me that so many women are eager to become more like men, which is to say less human, by adopting these most loathsome human (sic) characteristics.  I say to women, be what you already are and lose the self hatred and become more assertive and continue to make bold inroads into traditional male domains.  But please do not turn into assholes.  To men I say stop being assholes and reclaim your true humanity which means tapping into your feminine side, your female energy, and becoming gentle, nurturing and caring of others.

Feminism must lose the language of capitalism and change its focus to a more human and much kinder and cooperative dynamic in which men and women and all who fall outside the binary can live and flourish together in peace.