The Peacock 1838

Francois is slumped in his chair, clearly deflated.  "Where is the Holy mother?" he whines. "I am standing right here before you my son." "But you are an old woman.  Where is the virgin?" "Of course I'm an old woman.  I am over two thousand years old. I stopped being a virgin not long after my Son, Our lord was born.  A little bit too soon, but my poor husband had already been left hanging for the last nine months.  Though our first night together was nothing to write home about, it was the least I could have done for him." "Who are you?" "I am the mother of Jesus.  And by extension I am also your mother.  But, Francois, you must promise us one thing, please?" "What is that?" "Never ever kneel before anyone but my Son.  He is your rightful Lord, and it is high time for you to let him take my place on the throne of your heart."