It's hard not to think of how things are polarized these days. Or perhaps I could say, balkanized. This is certainly the case in the US with some 70 million Americans actually wanting Dump to continue festering in the Oval Office. And I know I am going to catch it from some of you, my Gentle Reader, for writing about love while referring to the Great Deplorable in such unloving terms. Well, Jesus was no less gentle when he referred to the Pharisees as hypocrites, vipers and coffins and mausoleums full of bones and rotting flesh, so we will give context its due. And maybe some of you among my Gentle Reader actually like President Dump, and if you do, then shame on you, and go back to reading Fox News where you and your kind belong.
Hardly loving today, am I now?
And then there was that spoiled, privileged rich white girl out jogging today and exhaling her microbes in my face while passing me instad of trying to move from the sidewalk onto the road, where there was no traffic, this being in Shaughnessy Heights. I asked her to wear a mask, and she retorted, why don't I instead, and then I said she should be wearing the mask because she was the one spewing her germs all over the place, and I reminded her that we are in the second wave of the pandemic with rising caseloads and that's when she dropped the F bomb and then I let her have it, shouting to her as she kept repeatedly telling me to fuck off and shut up that her behaviour was deplorable, that like so many other joggers she was being a self centred narcissistic too preoccupied with her physical beauty to care a damn about other people. She swore at me some more and I shouted back that she is self-centred and badly needs to grow a conscience and for swearing at someone old enough to be her father, her mother must be very proud of her right now.
Unfortunately, I did have to shout myself hoarse in order to be heard by her, but that entitled little brat deserved every bit of what I volleyed back at her, and I suspect that I really did hit a nerve or two with her. Some people only learn from getting their ass kicked and sometimes the kindest thing that we can do is to be kicking their asses for them. Because nothing else is going to work. They are just too obtuse and self-involved. The pretty ones are the very worst! And yes, giving her shit was the most loving thing to do under the circumstances. But I really prefer being nicer and much gentler. But sometimes....
But this is also an example of how balkanized we have all become. It is like we are all living in our own little universes with precious little to connect us to those that live outside of our bubble. I have really been thinking a lot about this lately. For example, the huge divide between progressive and conservative Americans and the havoc this is wreaking on their country. And our own gentler, watered down version of the same kind of polarization that is occurring here in dear little Canada. I suppose that it is too facile to suggest that love is the answer and let's all start singing Kumbaya, together of course, and followed by a stirring rendition of We Shall Overcome. And sometimes love has to be shouted.
I am also thinking here of the lack of respect on all sides as well as the very broad brushstrokes that we tend to paint everything and everyone in, especially if we don't happen to agree with or like them. For example, I heard on the radio the other day an interview with an individual who doesn't identify as having gender, and his preference of being addressed by the pronouns they and them. By the way, I am intentionally identifying this person as male, because his voice is decidedly masculine. In other words, he likely has a penis. Don't ask me how I know, but let's call it an educated guess. If he should happen to read this and get offended, then I do hope he gets over it.
Actually, no one is obligated to use they or them for his exalted self, and what this man is doing, under the cloak of queer rights and fighting homophobia is trying to use emotional blackmail as a way of holding others to his particular ideology. And if he doesn't like it then he will get upset, traumatised and threaten to kill himself. Little boy throws tantrum, holds his breath till his face turns blue, because he doesn't get exactly what he wants.
Very much the way an ex friend hissed at me "THEY!" when I referred by accident to her darling little daughter as "she," since she doesn't identify has having gender. Well, I also happen to be nonbinary, which is to say, I am gender neutral. I am still comfortable with the traditional masculine pronouns, but for the simple reason that biologically, I am male, and there is something centring and grounding about it. In other words, I refuse to make a division between my biological self and the rest of me. This empowers me to function well as a whole person.
By the same token, if someone wants me to refer to them as them or their, then there is a little protocol to follow. First, no lecturing, scolding or finger wagging. And no propaganda. It is not scientific fact that gender is nonbinary. Men and women have decidedly different brains. Androgyny is not the rule, but the exception, Nothing wrong about that, and as an androgynous person, there is plenty for me to celebrate. But to your face, I am not going to refer to you as them or their, for the same simple reason that while talking to you personally I will not be referring to you as him, her, his or hers. Simply that would be bad manners. If I were to be writing about you or speaking publicly about you, using your name, then I would refer to you by them and their, for the simple reason that this is good manners. While speaking about you privately, or thinking about you, I will call you by whatever the hell I want.
Happy now? No? Well, I'm sure you'll get over it.
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