Royal Guns, Bullets, And Bombs

So Kate and Will had a tea party for their royal kiddies in Victoria at Government House today.  And who were invited?  Twenty-four military officers, their spouses and their little commoner kiddies.  This has long stuck in my craw about the Royal Family.  Oh, yes, they are so lovely, polite, boring, refined, well bred, and twee.  They are the ultimate in twee.  Especially Will and Kate.  They are the most trifliest of the trifles.  And they seem like lovely and decent people.  I have nothing against them.  I like them.  Neither because they are royalty, nor despite.  They are so inarguably nice.  Twee, of course but this occupational hazard of being a royal is simply every bit is insurmountable as it is unavoidable.  They're not bad-looking either, especially Kate whom under slightly different circumstances would have been an awesome supermodel.  The Royal Glamazon.  And Will had that inescapably dorky adolescent cuteness a few years ago that got millions of teenage girls (and a few teenage boys!) all hot and wet and squealy,  But here I digress.

What's with the military connection?  Yes, the Queen is the Royal Commander of the Armed Forces, etc., but when I see male members of the Monarchy all decked out in military kitsch I do feel a tad nauseous, to say the least.  And then there's that deplorable sibling of Will's, that Royal Carrot Top of dubious paternity shooting and bombing and who knows what else in the Middle East?  Why aren't any of these silly bluebloods a little more concerned with peace?

I have never been a monarchist.  Neither am I strident republican.  I just don't care.  But if the Royals would just make a couple of little tweaks about their lifestyle and way of doing things I might look on them with slightly kinder eyes: that they totally ditch the military and start working for peace, and that they sell off most of their holdings, give their money away for peace and social and human development, get real jobs, and really do their level best to live like ordinary folk, which, like it or not, they are.  They can still be Royals.  They can still take them out of storage and dust them off and polish them for public display when needed.  But enough of the military nonsense.  Bombs and bullets kill people.  Not really that many enemy soldiers or terrorists, but an awful lot of children, old people, women, people with disabilities and ordinary family men.  Maybe a peaceful Royal Family?  One that is not so obscenely wealthy?