The Peacock 1038

Chuck wanted us to sleep together before leaving town the next morning for a tree planting job on the Island.  his idea was that, since dad was away, he could sleep with me.  I thought different.  We continued talking about it while eating together at the kitchen table.  There was no way I was going to show such disrespects for the man who sired and raised me and with such extraordinary car and common sense.  Church appeared to get it and so I put him to bed in kenny's room next to mine.  It worked out okay.  Curiously, we said nothing about our three encounters at Wreck Beach, whether out of tact or embarrassment or  bit of both.  Chuck was the first and only man with whom I had ever had sex, an experience even more intensely frightening that it was intensely pleasurable.

Francois is reclined as usual on the  sofa with his laptop.  "I left you guys a whole mess of food on top of the stove", he says, briefly looking up from his screen and before we can even say thank you, Carl and I are both in the kitchen where I am  loading up two large plates with Francois' delicious stir fry...

The Peacock 1037

 We are almost home and fortunately we have both run out of things to talk about.  And I cannot stop thinking about Chuck.  He actually followed me home one night, as though he hadn't already had enough of me that day.  It was our third and last meeting.  Dad was away at a clergy retreat leaving me with the house to myself.  It was well into summer, July, and we were having a warm spell.  It would have been about this time of evening, when the sun is getting ready to go down for its well deserved rest following a good sixteen hours in the sky.    I was famished, and made a ham and cheese sandwich with a big plate full of potato salad.  There was a knock on the door.  I looked through the peep hole and there he was, shirtless with a backpack, and so incredibly hungry and desirable....

The Peacock 1036

 "You got a history with that beach."

"Yeah, and I'm not telling you right now."

"Ah c'mon Chris.  We don't have secrets."

"About this one we are going to have to be patient."

"Aw!"

And now I do want to change the subject but I'm not sure just how to distract us from talking about Chuck, because it was Chuck I used to see down at Wreck Beach.  not often.  just three times.  But I don't feel ready yet, and Carl is so fucking inquisitive.  And to think, fresh off the baptism of the Spirit I am using that kind of language and recalling one of the most scandalous events of my shadowy past.  But this is going to have to wait.  Only now the memory has been resurrected and now it's going to linger in my face like the walking dead.  And how quickly we forget the joy and blessings of the innocence of God's perfect love....

The Peacock 1035

 "I was walking in the forest and then suddenly I was baptized in the Holy Spirit."

"Say again please?"

"Today, while walking in a different part of Pacific Spirit Park, I received the infilling of the Holy Spirit, there was this humongous release of joy and peace and I began singing in an unknown tongue."

"It really happened?

"It's happening now."

"I can see it all over you.  Yes, Chris, you are different.  Changed.  So happy and light, and kind and fun to be around.  I mean, I've always enjoyed being with you, but this is like when someone suddenly pours chocolate orange sauce all over the white chocolate ice cream."

"Yeah I guess that's one way of saying it.  The thing is, more than twenty-five years ago, along with my Dad, I received the laying on of hands.  For him it was all trumpets and fireworks and for me not even a rusted kazoo.  And then this lady prophesies and tells me that the Spirit would remain bottled up in me for a number of years until the time was right.  And, now, the time is right."

"That is just amazing, Chris.  I am so happy for you.  You know, it happened for me when I was twenty-one in Switzerland, but then it went underground for a long time.  Just now it seems to be bubbling again to the surface.  But maybe it would help if I stay away from that famous beach of yours."

"Dude, it ain't my  beach", and now we are both laughing.

"

The Peacock1034

 Carl soon relaxes his arm and lets it fall away from my shoulder.  The contact is nice, but prolonged can feel a bit icky, cloying after a while.  I think we both know this.

"So how far did you get on the beach?"

"What do you mean, how far."

"Chill.  You already said you didn't misbehave.  Not that it matters one way or the other..."

"But it does."

"Says you."

"Chris, it does matter.  Those happen to be the first penises I have seen other than my own since I sucked my last dick for pay in Amsterdam.  Do you know how long ago that was?  More than twenty years."

"So you never made it to the gay section."

"There happens to be a gay section?

"Never mind.  How are you feeling right now?"

"Shakey.  Impacted I would guess."

"Triggered?"

"Very."

"You're going to be all right."

"Pardon?"

"You're going to be all right."

"Say it again, please, Chris."

"You're going to be all rught,"

Thank you."

Okay, your turn.  Say it for yourself"

"I'm going to be all right."

"Again."

"I'm going to be all right."

"Say it again."

"I'm going to be all right."

"Very good.  Now let me tell you about my day."

"Yes, please....

The Peacock 1033

 Erik is on the phone.

"Where are you?" he demands, rather in the same tone of voice as Francois when he called me a few minutes ago.

"I just rescued Carl from Wreck Beach and now I'm walking him home."

"You what!  What were you doing down there?"

"It's really a lovely place, you know."

"You've been there?"

"On occasion.  But today no, I simply met him at the top of the trail because he was lost, this being his first time, so now I am providing him safe passage home.  Didn't you ever go there when you were here ten years ago?

He pauses..."once."

"And?"

"Never mind.  You said you'd call me later today.  What happened?"

"I kind of got swept away on a huge gust of God's love.  But here I am now.  How are you?"

"I just woke up.  I fell asleep soon after  our last phone call.  Now I'm wide awake."

"Would you like me to call you on Skype when I get home."

"Could you please?

"Okay, but after I've eaten.  I am famished right now.  See you in about an hour, maybe at nine or so?"

"Very good.  Bye."

And now I feel Carl's arm encircling my shoulders, and it does feel nice as he draws me close to him...

The Peacock 1032

 He looks anxious and stressed, and he seems sort of glad to see me as I cross the road to meet him.  Instinctively I open my arms and enfold him in a hug which he timidly accepts.  I feel light and happy and can only see the humour.  He looks like a puppy that has just peed on the carpet.  "Thanks for coming, Chris."

"You wasted no time finding our notorious clothing optional beach.  How did you get there."

"I repeated the walk we took to the forest yesterday, and then I went down to the beach where I just continued walking, and walking and walking.  I never imagined that I would see so many naked people on a single day."

"Was it enjoyable?" say I as we cross the road together and begin our walk home.

"Please don't ask me that question"  Then after a brief silence says, "So you welcome and forgive the prodigal sinner?"

"Sinner?  What did you do"  Did you have sex with anyone?"

"No."

"Did you go naked?"

"For maybe twenty minutes when I sat down on a log to rest, but then it felt weird so I got dressed again."

"Did you get drunk?"

"No."

"Did you take any drugs?"

"No."

"Were you tormented by unclean thoughts?" and now I am giggling.

"Of course I was!"

"Welcome home sinner" , and he offers a timid little smile in response to my unsuppressed giggling...