Life As Performance Art 119

Gracious Good Morning, Gentle Reader. It is just past 3:30 in the morning and I will be going back to sleep soon, likely just after breakfast and then later I'll finish writing this little bit of cheerful drivel. The early morning radio programming is hit and miss, I did not want to be bored back to sleep listening to some idiot talk about his business success, nor some other middle class zombie boring me about his golf game (I would rather watch paint dry), so it is a quiet early morning, or should I say, in Spanish, la madrugada tranquila. I wrote yesterday about the importance of being kind to others, especially given that with all the chances and uncertainty of this cosmic crap shoot we call life, ours could be the last friendly face that someone sees before they hear the words, Last Call, and it's time to close the bar. Well, yesterday, I also found myself, more than on one occasion, having to be quite assertive with different people. It began during a meeting at work in the morning. This branch of a government ministry that is now funding us also expects us to give our clients some lame ass surveys to fill out. I expressed that I will of course comply, since we must dance for our new masters, but with the caveat that my clients first express willingness and interest in said survey (two so far have turned it down). Giving clients surveys to fill out should not be part of my job, but I will cooperate up to a point, but for me, peer support is about client empowerment, so if the client says survey, I give her the survey, if he says no survey, then his wish is my command. Pure and simple. What is nice is that I was able to express my slight difference of opinion without getting defensive or resentful, maintaining throughout the sense of humour for which I will one day be famous. On my way to said meeting, an individual was being a nuisance riding his bike on the sidewalk. I simply said with a cheery cheery smile, "Oh, silly me, I'm walking on the bike path again." This fellow looked Chinese, older, and might not know very much English, or perhaps chose to ignore me, or whatever. The fact is, I said it humorously, playfully and simply left him alone after, instead of chasing him down and demand that he get his bicycle off the sidewalk or there would be unspecified consequences. Then there was the next bike idiot while I was walking between meetings with her light flashing in my eyes. Why people have on their blinding bike and car headlights in the middle of the day is really beyond me, but I told her politely but clearly that her light was hurting my eyes. She gave me rather a stupid look, and I again took care to leave her be. She already heard from me. In my second and last meeting yesterday my supervisor and I had a respectful argument about clients being allowed to smoke right in front of the door, where everyone can breathe in the second hand smoke. We were both able to get our point of view across, respectfully, and even though nothing is about to change, I do believe that we have both given each other something to think about, as well as coming up with coping strategies, short of anything changing at all. Later, in the local No Frills grocery store I had what could have become an unpleasant confrontation with a defensive checkout clerk. The policy at No Frills is that the customers bag their own groceries, but alternating customers are expected to pick up their goods on the far side of the conveyor belt, which given that we already bag our own grub, can be a bit much to ask. I just shut up and obey if the customer ahead of me has a full load, and there is no way they could reasonably share the conveyor belt, but yesterday, it was a small load and the checkout clerk was simply too lazy to push the button to move everything down to the end. So, just as she was trying to put my own small load on the other side, she indignantly scolded me about the policy to alternate out of courtesy for the previous customer, so they don't feel rushed (I had already been kept waiting by said customer as he fussed, and fussed and fussed some more over paying in exactly the right change). I gave her a little smile (I think) and merely said, "Courtesy cuts both ways." She did agree, anyway, I did not accuse her of anything, did not insist on talking to her supervisor, and was careful to be polite and succinct, while considering that she might also be having a difficult day, so why make it worse for her, even if she was on the verge of making my day worse for me. Was it lots of fun and all easy-peasy combining kindness with being assertive yesterday? About as much fun as a root canal. Worth the effort? Oh, yes! Do I need to improve on my approach? I will always have room for improvement. Am I going to get all stressed and neurotic about self-improvement? Nope! I'm too busy enjoying the ride.