What's Next? 24

One thing that is very certain during this uncertain era is the uncertainty of almost everything.   I was seated in a cafe this morning, enjoying a comfy chair by the door when a customer waiting for his order decided to stand near me, well within the two metre limit.  He was in fact standing over me with a little less that one metre distance between us.   He smiled at me and seemed to be complementing the art piece I am currently working on.  I didn't want to tell him to move back and give us our two metres, for our mutual safety and benefit in this blighted pandemic, because I don't want to come across as mean or bossy.  But this was not a safe distance, so, smiling, I got up and moved to the other chair, mentioning to this person that this is nothing at all personal, but we do need to maintain two metres distance.  I thought I was being polite.  I also thought he needed to know why I was moving, for his own future reference.

A bit later, the same gentleman was on his way out the door, and I wished him a good day.  He gave me a look that was anything but friendly.  I haven't mentioned by the way that this person is black.  I thought I would save that detail for the end, so as not to allow anyone to have a prejudiced view of what was occurring.  Of course, I am left wondering if, during this time of understandably heightened and hyper racial sensitivity, that that individual might have racialized our encounter, since I happen to be white.

Now, I am not going to say here that I am not a racist, since it isn't enough to say simply that we are not racists.  Neither am I going to say that I am anti-racist, though I happen to be firmly, profoundly and aggressively against racism in all its forms, but also I simply do not like slogans, so for this reason I am loath to labelling myself or others.  I will say that I have worked hard against all kinds of racism since I was at least fourteen years old, especially given that I had to begin by struggling against my own parents' racist attitudes.

What does strike me is the absolute importance of kindness, especially during this time of heightened sensitivity.  I would also like to add  here that none of us is ever always going to get it right.  We can only do our best, then forgive ourselves and each other when we don't get it right, because we're not going to get it right.  Then learn from it and move on till the next time we stumble.  And, Gentle Reader, we are going to stumble.  It's in the contract.  But that should never prevent us from getting up again, and offering pardon and mercy to ourselves and one another, and then try again...and again...and again...