"How did Kenny view himself in terms of his gender?" Carl wants to know.
"That became kind of a long standing joke between us. He really didn't seem to know, or care. His drag name was Cassandra, but once he left the sex trade, as he said, he was happy to leave Cassandra hanging in the closet."
"He never considered changing his gender?"
"He said he enjoyed peeing while standing. But also that Cassandra was a real and essential part of him."
"Was he androgynous?"
"Very. It was almost creepy the way he could smoothly transition from one to the other in one single breath. It was astounding."
"Like having a brother and sister both."
"Yes, exactly. But he didn't seem to think much about it. He just seemed to accept, I don't know, his gender fluidity? But I don't think he ever would have got hung up on pronouns. He seemed happy as he, him or his. But I also suspect that if anyone talked to him as Cassandra, he still wouldn't bat an eye."
"But you described him as your brother."
"And best friend."
"Your father was never concerned about his influence, I mean with his background in prostitution and drugs."
"Oh, there you go again", I reply with a hint of boredom, because I really am finished with overreacting to this kind of trigger. "And yes, I was so young and vulnerable and impressionable. Of course Kenny influenced me. But it was really very subtle and in ways that were pretty positive..."
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