Influence 2

Influence, of course, begins in the womb. The psychological and emotional state of the expectant mother, and her living environment are going to foster and impact the development of the fetus. It is even being suggested, with significant scientific backing, that the emotional wellbeing of the mother or the lack thereof, regulates the hormones that affect fetal development insofar that the child's sexual orientation will also be determined in utero. I don't know the details, but this does sound compelling. When the child emerges into the outer world, he is of course completely malleable to all the forces and persons around him. But this is also where influence and child development can really take on the form of mystery. And this is because no two children develop alike, not even by the same parents, not even if they happen to be twins, not even if they are identical twins. This leaves me wondering just how blank is the canvas? Or could it be the quality of the canvas that determines the way the paint is applied? Concerning my brother and I (he is older by three years), my grandfather used to joke that one has a Bible in his hand (me) and the other is holding a beer bottle (my brother). Which is to suggest that we are not merely passive recipients of the influences that mold us, but that we, along with everything that is at work around us and on us, are co-creating ourselves and our development as persons. When I think of the kind of parents that I had, and the era I grew up in as well as the environment and ambience, I often wonder if I would have turned out quite differently, if my will hadn't played a significant role in my development. I was still influenced by all of the above. This was going to be inevitable. But I controlled the influence. We all do. Had it all been environment, I probably would have turned out much like both my parents. I would be an alcoholic, like my father, with anger management problems like my mother. I would be working as an auto mechanic, or something similar. I would be married with a couple of adult children, likely long divorced and living alone after cohabiting for a while with some other random female. I would have turned out reasonably upwardly mobile, not well-off, but fairly comfortable, with my own house and a car. I would likely be apolitical, but leaning towards the conservatives or even further right. I would be also racist, maybe even white supremist, sexist and homophobic. I would have little or no interest in my community, and lead a socially isolated self-centred existence with maybe a handful of friends every bit as small minded and bigoted as me. I would be miserable, alcoholic and chronically depressed and probably be already showing symptoms of Alzheimer's in my sixties. I would also be strongly anti immigrant and would chafe and grouse and gripe at having to pay taxes, especially in order to give free drugs to addicts, and housing to the homeless. And I certainly wouldn't be writing this blog. So, this is how I really turned out: a Christian with no alcohol or drug or addiction issues, poor or low income, queer, single, politically and socially progressive, involved in mental health support work, an artist, passionate about protecting the environment and rescuing our planet from the ravages of human caused climate change. I do not have a car. I live in social housing. I speak Spanish fluently as a second language. I travel every year in Latin America. I have lots of friends and I am certainly not depressed. How did this happen? How did I happen! Stay tuned, Gentle Reader...